Almost Uncontrollable Urges's blog

shopping | August 25, 2008

When: August 24th, 2008, 11:30 PM

Where: Meijer

What: Last night my lady friend discovered she was out of feminine products and i told her i’d go to the store.  While i was walking through the aisles i thought about how weird it is for a guy to be buying feminine products at 11:30 at night without a “feminine” present.  So, i thought, why not take this up to the next level and throw in some hemorrhoid cream, some condoms, some wart remover, some herpacin, some ex-lax, some pepto bismol, and maybe a small doll or a dog toy…put all of it on the counter and stare intently at the cashier (not in a menacing way, just intently).

What stopped me: i didn’t want to go around the store picking all that stuff up and the self-check out lane was right there.

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What do we consider an almost uncontrollable urge? Well, first we need to establish a definition. Almost: al*most, [awl-mohst], -adverb, meaning: very nearly. Uncontrollable: un*con*trol*la*ble, [un-kuh n-troh-luh-buhl], -adjective, meaning: incapable of being controlled or restrained. Urge: [urj], -noun, meaning: an involuntary, natural, or instinctive impulse. Therefore, an almost uncontrollable urge is an involuntary, natural or instinctive impulse that is very nearly incapable of being controlled or restrained. These A.U.U.'s occur mostly in public settings, as there is very little to constrain a person in a private setting. The urge is frequently overcome due to any number of things, such as: societal standards, fear of retribution, fear of prosecution, fear of being left alone after having embarrased a significant other for the last time, etc. This is simply a list of several of the AUU's that we have had.

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